Ulric caused a food fight in school today...
I'll kill that damn wolf! He almost got us expelled!
-Red
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Friday, September 21, 2007
A Not-So-Very-Boring-Life (That sucks though)
So...
Ah, I'm guessing you're wondering how things are going now. You know, because we have a new edition to the family.
So about that...
Look, to cut to the chase, it's not going too well. We found Ulric last week - correction, he found us - and now he is living with us under the same roof.
Disobedient brats in boot camp behave better than he does. Trust me on that.
So here's what happened.
Ulric had the biggest flippin' tantrum about the mutant repressant when I injected it into him, and howled at the moon for the rest of the night. It kept me up, and angry, and so my wings didn't disappear until dawn broke upon my restless body, about the time Ulric stopped howling. I was still pissed, but no adrenaline was gushing through me. Remember: Adrenaline = Mutant. Don't forget it.
The worst part of the day was getting Ulric to look like an average teenager. Yeah, his wolfy ears, tail, claws, fangs and other mutant stuff was gone, but the amazingly powerful stench that freak gave off was bound to attract unwanted attention. Plus he couldn't go around wearing a pair of tattered, mud-stained cargo pants and nothing else.
And don't get me started with that hair of his.
We did our best with him. Honestly, we did our very best. We made sure he was clean enough to satisfy Jalana, and Trinity persuaded Johnny to let Ulric borrow some of his clothes so that he didn't have to go around looking like he didn't own any. She did manage to get some of Johnny's older clothes, ones that he doesn't care about anymore.
But despite all attempts, Jalana couldn't even lay a comb on Ulric's head.
That freak needs a serious cut. His hair is all over the place, sticking out in all directions and getting into his face and such. It's as wild as heck. And most likely to be more tangled than the outcome of me trying to knit.
It's already weird enough, because his hair is black streaked with gray. Dark gray to light gray, strongly reminding one of a wolf's fur coat.
But even after all of this, he still looks a little, you know, different. He can't blend in as much as me and Trinity can. But he could if he wanted to.
And then there was school.
Jalana had managed to cram Ulric into the same school as us, and his first day was on Tuesday. All his classes either have me, Trinity, or Johnny in them. One of them has all four of us, and one of them only has Ulric. I'm not going to get into much of the details now, but Ulric, from what I've seen, is behaving fairly well, although he is failing more than one class already.
I think Trinity had a crush on him at first (I will painfully admit that freak is good-looking, in an evil, wolfish way) but whatever emotion she felt for him died when she discovered her best bra was hiding under his bed pillow, and that he had somehow acquired frog eggs and filled her shampoo bottle with them. Other inappropriate acts include making crap explode from the only toilet in the house, tearing up my bedroom, peeing on Johnny's bed mattress, eating Trinity's homework, tampering with the hair salon, tearing up Johnny's favorite pair of converse shoes, taking roadkill and eating it before our very eyes, tampering with all my scientific things, digging his nose into any business that's not his, and most of all making our lives miserable. I swear he is trying to get me mad in public so my wings pop out.
He is the world's most unlikeable person. Really, I am tempted to throw him out into the wild, but another part of me wants him to suffer living in reality.
Crap. Gotta fly. Trouble in the next room.
-Red
Ah, I'm guessing you're wondering how things are going now. You know, because we have a new edition to the family.
So about that...
Look, to cut to the chase, it's not going too well. We found Ulric last week - correction, he found us - and now he is living with us under the same roof.
Disobedient brats in boot camp behave better than he does. Trust me on that.
So here's what happened.
Ulric had the biggest flippin' tantrum about the mutant repressant when I injected it into him, and howled at the moon for the rest of the night. It kept me up, and angry, and so my wings didn't disappear until dawn broke upon my restless body, about the time Ulric stopped howling. I was still pissed, but no adrenaline was gushing through me. Remember: Adrenaline = Mutant. Don't forget it.
The worst part of the day was getting Ulric to look like an average teenager. Yeah, his wolfy ears, tail, claws, fangs and other mutant stuff was gone, but the amazingly powerful stench that freak gave off was bound to attract unwanted attention. Plus he couldn't go around wearing a pair of tattered, mud-stained cargo pants and nothing else.
And don't get me started with that hair of his.
We did our best with him. Honestly, we did our very best. We made sure he was clean enough to satisfy Jalana, and Trinity persuaded Johnny to let Ulric borrow some of his clothes so that he didn't have to go around looking like he didn't own any. She did manage to get some of Johnny's older clothes, ones that he doesn't care about anymore.
But despite all attempts, Jalana couldn't even lay a comb on Ulric's head.
That freak needs a serious cut. His hair is all over the place, sticking out in all directions and getting into his face and such. It's as wild as heck. And most likely to be more tangled than the outcome of me trying to knit.
It's already weird enough, because his hair is black streaked with gray. Dark gray to light gray, strongly reminding one of a wolf's fur coat.
But even after all of this, he still looks a little, you know, different. He can't blend in as much as me and Trinity can. But he could if he wanted to.
And then there was school.
Jalana had managed to cram Ulric into the same school as us, and his first day was on Tuesday. All his classes either have me, Trinity, or Johnny in them. One of them has all four of us, and one of them only has Ulric. I'm not going to get into much of the details now, but Ulric, from what I've seen, is behaving fairly well, although he is failing more than one class already.
I think Trinity had a crush on him at first (I will painfully admit that freak is good-looking, in an evil, wolfish way) but whatever emotion she felt for him died when she discovered her best bra was hiding under his bed pillow, and that he had somehow acquired frog eggs and filled her shampoo bottle with them. Other inappropriate acts include making crap explode from the only toilet in the house, tearing up my bedroom, peeing on Johnny's bed mattress, eating Trinity's homework, tampering with the hair salon, tearing up Johnny's favorite pair of converse shoes, taking roadkill and eating it before our very eyes, tampering with all my scientific things, digging his nose into any business that's not his, and most of all making our lives miserable. I swear he is trying to get me mad in public so my wings pop out.
He is the world's most unlikeable person. Really, I am tempted to throw him out into the wild, but another part of me wants him to suffer living in reality.
Crap. Gotta fly. Trouble in the next room.
-Red
Friday, September 14, 2007
Eventful, Yet I Wish It Didn't Happen
The wireless had been down since god knows when, and now it's back UP!!!(thanks to Johnny)
So.
Eventful year of school.
VERY eventful.
Almost too much (in the context of "stay hidden", "don't blow your cover", and "Whatever you do, don't get pissed off!" It actually revived me somewhat.)
So here's the scoop.
Trinity and I were out late that night, because we were at the movies and Jalana said she couldn't pick us up, on account she's a hair stylist and today was an exceptionally busy day. So we walked home, knowing we could take care of anyone who wanted to lay a finger on us. So we walked home, and nothing happened for most of the way. It was only when we were walking down a dark alleyway that Trinity paused, sniffing the air. Even though our freakaziod mutant genes were repressed, we still had enhanced senses. Like I have keen eyes and keen hearing, and of course I'm quick to react, and Trinity could smell things like nobody's freaking business, and we are freakishly fast runners.
So when she paused and did the sniffing thing, I stopped walking too, and we both listened. I scanned my surroundings, still being able to see in the dark more than the average human could ever do. And guess what?
Whatever Trinity was smelling was certainly well hidden.
She retorted quietly that whatever she was smelling stinks like an animal, and that it was hard to ignore.
Like spider senses, we both felt a prickling at the back of our necks, and suddenly, we were ambushed.
By what I first thought was a human, and then I thought was a dog, and somehow in the mix my nostrils came in contact with fur and caught a whiff of something awful.
Ugh.
But in about two seconds my brain registered what it was.
Wait for it...wait for it...
(pause for effect)
Another mutant.
Yes, I'm serious!!! Another freak like us! After the slight skirmish, the freak jumped back into an animal pose, crouching and baring his pointed teeth. Trinity and I were back up on our feet faster than one's reaction time allows, and I had enough time to notice the freak's features.
A lupine hybrid no doubt. Muscular body, wild grayish-black hair, claws, fangs, wolf ears and tail. Even his looks reminded me of a wolf. He wasn't wearing a shirt either. I was feeling adrenaline gush into my blood stream, feeling my jaw clench, my fists tighten...
And my back tingle.
Trinity experienced the same feeling. She wanted those claws out. I mean, after (what was it again?) A week of boring, dull, unexciting school, one would do anything for a bit of excitement.
I don't know how you saps of humans can stand it.
But the freak attacked us like he was trying to kill us for meat.
I don't know much about wolves, but I do know they travel in packs, and this guy was a lone wolf. I know that the whole pack brings down the prey and then the pack leader gets first dibs, but I've never heard of a wolf hunting by himself.
Yet I do know the combination of adrenaline and mutant-repressant isn't a happy mix.
Yes, that did happen.
So then it came. Wings out, yellow eyes and anger to boot. Trinity was in the same boat as my, with claws ready, eyes flaring electric blue. I was hoping this would make an intimidating impression, but the freak only grinned an unholy grin, making me even more pissed.
Uber uncool!
I don't know the mix of wolf vs. raptor, because we're both predators. And I don't know if a fox is a predator, or if it has a prey (minus foxhunting). And even if it did, Trinity would claw you to death before you can touch her.
So to make a long story short, there was fighting, and there was the occasional swearing, and of course there was blood. But it was two against one, in our favor, so it was a fair battle. Eventually we wrung the animal to the ground, and held him down as he snarled and growled and tired to bite our fingers off. Or anything else he could get at. If he had torn any feathers out I would have pounded him into the ground.
There was more to growling and snarling when it comes to mutants. I knew he could talk, having heard a distinct swear word when Trinity attempted to punch his face in, succeeding by making his nose bleed.
"All right, you mutt!" I said once he was pinned to the ground, grabbing those mounds of shaggy wild hair on his head and yanking on it. "Tell me the reason you tried to take us on." The freak snarled, exposing those hideous canines. I yanked on his hair more.
"Talk or you're going straight to the kennel!!!" I threatened, saying in a sarcastic way I was going to take him back to whatever Mad Lab he came from if I didn't get info out of him before my patients expired.
Suddenly Trinity bit him on the ear, looking not happy about doing so either. I didn't know if this was a sign of affection or a punishment for not cooperating, but either way it made me pause and give her a look. Trinity began spitting out saliva on the ground, looking disgusted.
But then the freak did something weird, which is what all freaks do best.
He kinda froze up for a second, and then relaxed, and his facial expression looked a little more sane and a little less sardonic and wicked.
"Fine, you win!" he said. He first demanded that we let him go before he told us what he knew. And guess what?
We didn't buy that for one second.
Trinity said to spit it out before she did it for him, and only after did we learn everything we would turn him loose.
He started out with his name. Ulric. It's a crazy name (but then again, the name "Red" and "Trinity" are not common either). He said he came from a lab, refusing to mention what lab and where it was located. He escaped from it, like I did forever ago, and took a fancy into being a criminal. Trinity asked him why he was taken to doing evil, and he angrily retorted that the world was evil and wicked and people deserved to die.
Life in the lab wasn't nice to him I bet.
But anyway, we got to why he attacked us, and he said that he thought we were humans and wanted to scare us.
Pffft! That failed miserably.
I should have know this freak was a no-good experiment. All wolves are the bad guys in any scenario. This one was no different, seeking out people like piglets to scare the crap out of them. I was not amused by his odd crooked smile. It made me not believe a single word he said.
"You're a mangy pack of lies," I said. "You're not leaving until you tell the truth."
"Me? Leave?" he said, sounding as though that was funny. "Why should I? It's a full moon, so I'm feeling exceptionally wild, and I've got two of my kind here. Why shouldn't we go a little wild tonight?" Trinity later told me he was touching her leg.
OH MY F---!!!!!
He was hitting on us! Can you believe that!?! He's such an ANIMAL!!!
Of course we wanted to beat him up again, but the most I did was slap him. Really hard. The freak took it back.
But now that we got all the information out of him, we didn't know what to do with him. He angrily cried out that we promised to let him go, but we weren't going to turn him loose now, not since we knew he was a criminal.
After debating, we decided to take him home with us and ask Jalana for advice. Even though we were better at dealing with the mutant business than she was, she knew about the "ins" and "outs" of everything. My hope was that she would take him to the kennel, or get rid of him somehow, because I didn't want a thieving dog slinking around the house, taking things that didn't belong to him.
But I had to bite him on the ear before we went home, as Trinity said, because otherwise he wouldn't listen to me. I did so, unwillingly, and me and Trinity both held one of his arms the whole way, just so he wouldn't run off. But the freak simply flattened his ears against the sides of his head, and scowled, growling occasionally.
We couldn't simply walk home now, we realized, because we were now mutant and still pretty pissed. So we decided to go with a different plan.
I was in the air, and flying, making sure I wasn't seen. Trinity was running super uber fast, zigzagging and swerving all the way to Jalana's house. With the freak clinging onto her for dear life. Poor sap. When I got to Jalana's house he was all shaken up, with his ears flat against his head and his eyes wide. He said he could run fast also, but all that swerving was so spontaneous it scared the living hell out of him.
Both Jalana and Johnny were shocked to see our state, and even more shocked to see Ulric. I introduced the freak to the family and Ulric held his hand out to Johnny to shake, grinning horribly. His claws were out, long and deadly. Johnny didn't shake his hand. Trinity ran into his arms though, throwing Ulric a look saying that yes she does have someone already. For a moment, I thought I saw a twinge of jealousy in those wolfy eyes of his.
To my horror, Jalana wanted him to stay.
Everyone's jaws dropped. Not one of us wanted him to stay, and Ulric said he would tear the house and salon apart if he was condemned to live here.
Jalana firmly chomped down on his ear, apparently knowing the secret to automatic obedience when it comes to wolves. Ulric threw a tantrum then, yelling at us to stop biting his ears. But what's worse was that now he had to obey. It was embedded in his wolfness that whoever bit the ears of a pack leader would gain respect from the leader.
Which sucks...
This happened a few days ago, when we had no homework that night and we had time to go to the movies. Now the freak is staying with us (god, help me!) and it's not been good so far.
I had to inject the mutant-depressant into his blood stream, for his own safety, and he threw a freak-out fit after that when he discovered his tail, ears, claws, fangs and all other mutant traits were gone.
Trinity can relate.
Jalana tried to cheer him up by making steak for dinner, but the freak said it tasted like !$@&.
But here's the coup-de-grâce.
Jalana enrolled him into our school.
He's going there this monday.
...My life is getting crazier and crazier by the minute...
More later. Ulric's having a tantrum again...
-Red
So.
Eventful year of school.
VERY eventful.
Almost too much (in the context of "stay hidden", "don't blow your cover", and "Whatever you do, don't get pissed off!" It actually revived me somewhat.)
So here's the scoop.
Trinity and I were out late that night, because we were at the movies and Jalana said she couldn't pick us up, on account she's a hair stylist and today was an exceptionally busy day. So we walked home, knowing we could take care of anyone who wanted to lay a finger on us. So we walked home, and nothing happened for most of the way. It was only when we were walking down a dark alleyway that Trinity paused, sniffing the air. Even though our freakaziod mutant genes were repressed, we still had enhanced senses. Like I have keen eyes and keen hearing, and of course I'm quick to react, and Trinity could smell things like nobody's freaking business, and we are freakishly fast runners.
So when she paused and did the sniffing thing, I stopped walking too, and we both listened. I scanned my surroundings, still being able to see in the dark more than the average human could ever do. And guess what?
Whatever Trinity was smelling was certainly well hidden.
She retorted quietly that whatever she was smelling stinks like an animal, and that it was hard to ignore.
Like spider senses, we both felt a prickling at the back of our necks, and suddenly, we were ambushed.
By what I first thought was a human, and then I thought was a dog, and somehow in the mix my nostrils came in contact with fur and caught a whiff of something awful.
Ugh.
But in about two seconds my brain registered what it was.
Wait for it...wait for it...
(pause for effect)
Another mutant.
Yes, I'm serious!!! Another freak like us! After the slight skirmish, the freak jumped back into an animal pose, crouching and baring his pointed teeth. Trinity and I were back up on our feet faster than one's reaction time allows, and I had enough time to notice the freak's features.
A lupine hybrid no doubt. Muscular body, wild grayish-black hair, claws, fangs, wolf ears and tail. Even his looks reminded me of a wolf. He wasn't wearing a shirt either. I was feeling adrenaline gush into my blood stream, feeling my jaw clench, my fists tighten...
And my back tingle.
Trinity experienced the same feeling. She wanted those claws out. I mean, after (what was it again?) A week of boring, dull, unexciting school, one would do anything for a bit of excitement.
I don't know how you saps of humans can stand it.
But the freak attacked us like he was trying to kill us for meat.
I don't know much about wolves, but I do know they travel in packs, and this guy was a lone wolf. I know that the whole pack brings down the prey and then the pack leader gets first dibs, but I've never heard of a wolf hunting by himself.
Yet I do know the combination of adrenaline and mutant-repressant isn't a happy mix.
Yes, that did happen.
So then it came. Wings out, yellow eyes and anger to boot. Trinity was in the same boat as my, with claws ready, eyes flaring electric blue. I was hoping this would make an intimidating impression, but the freak only grinned an unholy grin, making me even more pissed.
Uber uncool!
I don't know the mix of wolf vs. raptor, because we're both predators. And I don't know if a fox is a predator, or if it has a prey (minus foxhunting). And even if it did, Trinity would claw you to death before you can touch her.
So to make a long story short, there was fighting, and there was the occasional swearing, and of course there was blood. But it was two against one, in our favor, so it was a fair battle. Eventually we wrung the animal to the ground, and held him down as he snarled and growled and tired to bite our fingers off. Or anything else he could get at. If he had torn any feathers out I would have pounded him into the ground.
There was more to growling and snarling when it comes to mutants. I knew he could talk, having heard a distinct swear word when Trinity attempted to punch his face in, succeeding by making his nose bleed.
"All right, you mutt!" I said once he was pinned to the ground, grabbing those mounds of shaggy wild hair on his head and yanking on it. "Tell me the reason you tried to take us on." The freak snarled, exposing those hideous canines. I yanked on his hair more.
"Talk or you're going straight to the kennel!!!" I threatened, saying in a sarcastic way I was going to take him back to whatever Mad Lab he came from if I didn't get info out of him before my patients expired.
Suddenly Trinity bit him on the ear, looking not happy about doing so either. I didn't know if this was a sign of affection or a punishment for not cooperating, but either way it made me pause and give her a look. Trinity began spitting out saliva on the ground, looking disgusted.
But then the freak did something weird, which is what all freaks do best.
He kinda froze up for a second, and then relaxed, and his facial expression looked a little more sane and a little less sardonic and wicked.
"Fine, you win!" he said. He first demanded that we let him go before he told us what he knew. And guess what?
We didn't buy that for one second.
Trinity said to spit it out before she did it for him, and only after did we learn everything we would turn him loose.
He started out with his name. Ulric. It's a crazy name (but then again, the name "Red" and "Trinity" are not common either). He said he came from a lab, refusing to mention what lab and where it was located. He escaped from it, like I did forever ago, and took a fancy into being a criminal. Trinity asked him why he was taken to doing evil, and he angrily retorted that the world was evil and wicked and people deserved to die.
Life in the lab wasn't nice to him I bet.
But anyway, we got to why he attacked us, and he said that he thought we were humans and wanted to scare us.
Pffft! That failed miserably.
I should have know this freak was a no-good experiment. All wolves are the bad guys in any scenario. This one was no different, seeking out people like piglets to scare the crap out of them. I was not amused by his odd crooked smile. It made me not believe a single word he said.
"You're a mangy pack of lies," I said. "You're not leaving until you tell the truth."
"Me? Leave?" he said, sounding as though that was funny. "Why should I? It's a full moon, so I'm feeling exceptionally wild, and I've got two of my kind here. Why shouldn't we go a little wild tonight?" Trinity later told me he was touching her leg.
OH MY F---!!!!!
He was hitting on us! Can you believe that!?! He's such an ANIMAL!!!
Of course we wanted to beat him up again, but the most I did was slap him. Really hard. The freak took it back.
But now that we got all the information out of him, we didn't know what to do with him. He angrily cried out that we promised to let him go, but we weren't going to turn him loose now, not since we knew he was a criminal.
After debating, we decided to take him home with us and ask Jalana for advice. Even though we were better at dealing with the mutant business than she was, she knew about the "ins" and "outs" of everything. My hope was that she would take him to the kennel, or get rid of him somehow, because I didn't want a thieving dog slinking around the house, taking things that didn't belong to him.
But I had to bite him on the ear before we went home, as Trinity said, because otherwise he wouldn't listen to me. I did so, unwillingly, and me and Trinity both held one of his arms the whole way, just so he wouldn't run off. But the freak simply flattened his ears against the sides of his head, and scowled, growling occasionally.
We couldn't simply walk home now, we realized, because we were now mutant and still pretty pissed. So we decided to go with a different plan.
I was in the air, and flying, making sure I wasn't seen. Trinity was running super uber fast, zigzagging and swerving all the way to Jalana's house. With the freak clinging onto her for dear life. Poor sap. When I got to Jalana's house he was all shaken up, with his ears flat against his head and his eyes wide. He said he could run fast also, but all that swerving was so spontaneous it scared the living hell out of him.
Both Jalana and Johnny were shocked to see our state, and even more shocked to see Ulric. I introduced the freak to the family and Ulric held his hand out to Johnny to shake, grinning horribly. His claws were out, long and deadly. Johnny didn't shake his hand. Trinity ran into his arms though, throwing Ulric a look saying that yes she does have someone already. For a moment, I thought I saw a twinge of jealousy in those wolfy eyes of his.
To my horror, Jalana wanted him to stay.
Everyone's jaws dropped. Not one of us wanted him to stay, and Ulric said he would tear the house and salon apart if he was condemned to live here.
Jalana firmly chomped down on his ear, apparently knowing the secret to automatic obedience when it comes to wolves. Ulric threw a tantrum then, yelling at us to stop biting his ears. But what's worse was that now he had to obey. It was embedded in his wolfness that whoever bit the ears of a pack leader would gain respect from the leader.
Which sucks...
This happened a few days ago, when we had no homework that night and we had time to go to the movies. Now the freak is staying with us (god, help me!) and it's not been good so far.
I had to inject the mutant-depressant into his blood stream, for his own safety, and he threw a freak-out fit after that when he discovered his tail, ears, claws, fangs and all other mutant traits were gone.
Trinity can relate.
Jalana tried to cheer him up by making steak for dinner, but the freak said it tasted like !$@&.
But here's the coup-de-grâce.
Jalana enrolled him into our school.
He's going there this monday.
...My life is getting crazier and crazier by the minute...
More later. Ulric's having a tantrum again...
-Red
Monday, September 3, 2007
Stay...Calm...Red....AAAAAGH!!!!
Was there any time in your life where you've felt cold sweat on your brow, and you couldn't sit still for thirty seconds and you continually pace the floor, feeling as though if anyone surprised you you would jump through the roof?
Probably, but not as extreme in your case.
To think that anyone could be that worried about the first day of school. Well, that's me for you. School's tomorrow, and I have to get up at 7:00 am and go to a place I really don't want to go.
Look, I'm new at this. There's going to be a crap load of people there, and all of them are going to be non-mutant homo sapiens sapiens.
You won't recognize me now. I'm literally grounded for the whole freaking school year. As in flightless. All my mutant traits are gone. Even my yellow eyes. (You know how owls have those creepy yellow eyes. That's what I have, er, had). Jeez, now I know how you humans feel. I bet it sucks to be a human. But now my eyes are brown, so there you go.
But what really makes me want to pop is Trinity. She is, like, uber cool with going to school. She knows more about Social Life than I ever would have guessed. Which makes me feel amateurish about everything.
Crap...This is going to be hell in a handbasket.
Or should I say backpack?
Ugh...
-Red
P.S. This post is uber late, and that is only because the freaking wireless was down!!!
Probably, but not as extreme in your case.
To think that anyone could be that worried about the first day of school. Well, that's me for you. School's tomorrow, and I have to get up at 7:00 am and go to a place I really don't want to go.
Look, I'm new at this. There's going to be a crap load of people there, and all of them are going to be non-mutant homo sapiens sapiens.
You won't recognize me now. I'm literally grounded for the whole freaking school year. As in flightless. All my mutant traits are gone. Even my yellow eyes. (You know how owls have those creepy yellow eyes. That's what I have, er, had). Jeez, now I know how you humans feel. I bet it sucks to be a human. But now my eyes are brown, so there you go.
But what really makes me want to pop is Trinity. She is, like, uber cool with going to school. She knows more about Social Life than I ever would have guessed. Which makes me feel amateurish about everything.
Crap...This is going to be hell in a handbasket.
Or should I say backpack?
Ugh...
-Red
P.S. This post is uber late, and that is only because the freaking wireless was down!!!
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